The "palemo" has just been going and I've been trying my hardest to keep all the balls juggling in the air. Work is just killing my behind and I barely have time to sleep and spend coo-ing time with the beau, talk less of wedding planning. The latest development anyhow is that my flower girl has dropped out and will no longer be able to make my destination wedding. When her mother, one of my closest friends, told me I just had to be calm about it all. Well, at least to her. After all, it's not by force that someone must do bridal train so what other choice did I have? I had told them almost a year ago now that their daughter must be in my bridal party. She's a beautiful young girl that I just love so much and I've seen grow right from the belly into the 6 year-old she now is. I love her so much. Even the last time I saw my friend which was just a couple of months ago, she still confirmed to me that they were coming. Alas, this past weekend the call came and after speaking for about 20min she finally out with it. I just told her it was okay and hung up.
I felt so down about it but not in a depressed way you know, I was just weary of wedding planning and all the disappointments it brings. A friend of mine who's also getting married (this week!) was telling us that her Maid of Honor quit last week! So she's not going to have an MOH, she seemed quite zen about it but by this time I know that look of bridal disappointment from a mile away. It's just so tough. During this time I've found out that the people I thought I could count on the most were actually just not there and the people you didn't even think twice about are the ones that are jumping through all kinds of hoops to make sure they are there for you. I was sad. Then my mom informs me she'll only be coming in for 2 days and then she'll be flying back to the states. I tried to convince her to stay longer since I would like my mother to be around in the final days of my wedding but she said no. Also I've been so busy I didn't have time to do the invitation cards so I had to let that go. Then I was struggling to find time to type out the order of ceremony for the ceremony booklets and its been hard to squeeze in time between this very busy period at work. So i don't have invitation cards or ceremony booklets at the moment. I decided to hire someone to do them for me in the States and just ship them to my Mom's but she gave me a paypal account and I haven't been able to get it to work.
So that's the latest tale from my side of things. Oh, I had a mini-breakdown two days ago, had to head to the doctors but I think I'm all better now.
On a lighter (funner note) sometimes I get really scared when I think of how much I love Bolaji. Today I finally typed up those programs in Word format and it was very emotional to me just reading the vows we are going to say to each other. The ceremony reads so beautifully and I can't wait to say those words of covenant to my beautiful man. I found this little reading online and I'm incorporating it into our service. It gives me goosebumps just reading it so I've only read it a few times but everytime I read it my mind goes "wow, how did I get this lucky with this man of mine?" There's no one else I'd rather share my life with. So upon all the drama and weariness, I can't wait for those moments!
Blessing of the Hands - revised by Rev. Daniel L. Harris:
“These are the hands of your best friend, young and strong and full of love for you, that are holding yours on your wedding day, as you promise to love each other today, tomorrow, and forever. These are the hands that will work alongside yours, as together you build your future. These are the hands that will passionately love you and cherish you through the years, and with the slightest touch, will comfort you like no other. These are the hands that will hold you when fear or grief fills your mind. These are the hands that will countless times wipe the tears from your eyes; tears of sorrow, and as in today, tears of joy. These are the hands that will tenderly hold your children, the hands that will help you to hold your family as one. These are the hands that will give you strength when you need it. And lastly, these are the hands that even when wrinkled and aged, will still be reaching for yours, still giving you the same unspoken tenderness with just a touch.”
