Friday, November 11, 2011

Approaching 2 years...

Friday, November 11, 2011
Thinking about Bo and I moving closer to our 2nd year mark. Time does fly. We've been married almost 2 years, lived together almost 3 years, dated for almost 5 years. The numbers seem completely incredulous to me. My husband is my best friend, he's my shining armour, he's my fall guy, he's my Batman and I'm his Robin. A friend asked us recently if we thought we were still in the honeymoon phase. My answer was very clear and I think she was a bit shocked by it. Almost immediately I responded that I don't think we're in the honeymoon phase any longer. Certainly I'm not. I looked over at Bo to get his own response and he agreed that he doesn't believe we're in the honeymoon phase any longer. We're in quite another phase all together. One that I'm so happy with. We both responded that what we have now is more sustainable. It doesn't sound romantic does it? However, to be very honest, it's more romantic to me than anything else.

Take for example this week. I think we've had a small tiff for the past three days over some miscommunication. There were small squabbles but there was still tension. However on all three days the presence of tension in our discussion doesn't rattle us any longer. We just take a deep breathe, listen even more carefully and speak even more even-minded. One party sees the other side or we just agree to disagree and move on with kisses laughter and hugs. I love that. We're not goo-goo eyed at each other marveling about how perfect the other person is but we're holding on tight to each other because we realize this is the only other person who knows how messed up I can be sometimes and still wants to stick around for the next moment. That's why we hold each other tighter these days. Our laughter is real, soft, and genuine.

I read somewhere recently that your husband cannot be your best friend. In the same book there are stories of wives who take summers away from their husbands, or who cultivate intimate but non-sexual relationships with people outside their marriage. It works for them I suppose but also for me, truly, my husband IS my best friend. I never get tired of his company or having him around. Our conversation NEVER gets stale or boring to me. At least not yet anyway. The other day Bo and I were watching a movie and though he sat reclining on the sofa, I sat up but throughout the movie, no matter how I shifted or he shifted, Bo's hand would somehow find it's way to the small of my back or to my thigh and just rest there. I don't think he knows this but I felt just so connected to him even then. It was so subconscious for him, I don't think he was even thinking about it - I would shift a bit, and his hand would move but the moment I settled back down, there went his hand back to the bottom of my back. Just two souls, sharing their lives, sharing their space, sharing their experiences.

I'm one of those people who believe in renewing their marriage vows frequently. I've been thinking about which milestone would be best to start this tradition. Bo knows this and just rolls his eyes at me everytime I mention it, LOL. I'm thinking our fifth year anniversary. May God keep us to see that day in joy. I have grand plans for my fifth. A new ring, a beautiful dress, and a beautiful reception with just close family and friends, outdoors somewhere. So for me I'm very happy with 2 but 5, now THAT's going to be a party!

BabyWatch: I'm afraid it's all silent on that front! I had a dream recently about when I would have my first child. In the dream my age was made very clear to me. I don't know if it was some sort of revelation we will see. Right now Bo and I are very much in a non-baby phase. Sometimes I feel we could be like this forever...
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