Wednesday, March 24, 2010

No Flower Girl

Wednesday, March 24, 2010


The "palemo" has just been going and I've been trying my hardest to keep all the balls juggling in the air. Work is just killing my behind and I barely have time to sleep and spend coo-ing time with the beau, talk less of wedding planning. The latest development anyhow is that my flower girl has dropped out and will no longer be able to make my destination wedding. When her mother, one of my closest friends, told me I just had to be calm about it all. Well, at least to her. After all, it's not by force that someone must do bridal train so what other choice did I have? I had told them almost a year ago now that their daughter must be in my bridal party. She's a beautiful young girl that I just love so much and I've seen grow right from the belly into the 6 year-old she now is. I love her so much. Even the last time I saw my friend which was just a couple of months ago, she still confirmed to me that they were coming. Alas, this past weekend the call came and after speaking for about 20min she finally out with it. I just told her it was okay and hung up.

I felt so down about it but not in a depressed way you know, I was just weary of wedding planning and all the disappointments it brings. A friend of mine who's also getting married (this week!) was telling us that her Maid of Honor quit last week! So she's not going to have an MOH, she seemed quite zen about it but by this time I know that look of bridal disappointment from a mile away. It's just so tough. During this time I've found out that the people I thought I could count on the most were actually just not there and the people you didn't even think twice about are the ones that are jumping through all kinds of hoops to make sure they are there for you. I was sad. Then my mom informs me she'll only be coming in for 2 days and then she'll be flying back to the states. I tried to convince her to stay longer since I would like my mother to be around in the final days of my wedding but she said no. Also I've been so busy I didn't have time to do the invitation cards so I had to let that go. Then I was struggling to find time to type out the order of ceremony for the ceremony booklets and its been hard to squeeze in time between this very busy period at work. So i don't have invitation cards or ceremony booklets at the moment. I decided to hire someone to do them for me in the States and just ship them to my Mom's but she gave me a paypal account and I haven't been able to get it to work.

So that's the latest tale from my side of things. Oh, I had a mini-breakdown two days ago, had to head to the doctors but I think I'm all better now.

On a lighter (funner note) sometimes I get really scared when I think of how much I love Bolaji. Today I finally typed up those programs in Word format and it was very emotional to me just reading the vows we are going to say to each other. The ceremony reads so beautifully and I can't wait to say those words of covenant to my beautiful man. I found this little reading online and I'm incorporating it into our service. It gives me goosebumps just reading it so I've only read it a few times but everytime I read it my mind goes "wow, how did I get this lucky with this man of mine?" There's no one else I'd rather share my life with. So upon all the drama and weariness, I can't wait for those moments!

Blessing of the Hands - revised by Rev. Daniel L. Harris:

“These are the hands of your best friend, young and strong and full of love for you, that are holding yours on your wedding day, as you promise to love each other today, tomorrow, and forever. These are the hands that will work alongside yours, as together you build your future. These are the hands that will passionately love you and cherish you through the years, and with the slightest touch, will comfort you like no other. These are the hands that will hold you when fear or grief fills your mind. These are the hands that will countless times wipe the tears from your eyes; tears of sorrow, and as in today, tears of joy. These are the hands that will tenderly hold your children, the hands that will help you to hold your family as one. These are the hands that will give you strength when you need it. And lastly, these are the hands that even when wrinkled and aged, will still be reaching for yours, still giving you the same unspoken tenderness with just a touch.”


11 comments:

Mrs A said...

just take a deep breath and relax... everything will sort itself out...

Miss Natural said...

aww big hug. on that day you're going to forget your issues, not problems. Its all about the two of you and God, no one else, nothing else matters! that write up is truly beautiful, im going to save it cos I can imagine reading that with meaning, with a special feeling in mind. I can almost mimic your goosebumps lol

Jennifer A. said...

Ok, the "These are the hands" write-up almost made me cry...awwww...

As someone who said "I do" three months ago, I'm feeling the goosebumps all over again...lol

Abby the Tiny Traveler said...

I've heard the blessing of the hands at a wedding before and it is truly a touching and emotional piece. No matter what other people do or don't do with regards to your wedding the ultimate reason for all this madness is that you will be married to the man you love. Keep your head up and I'll be praying for ya!!

Good Naija Girl said...

My friends who have gotten married have found the same thing you mentioned: the people you think you can count on for one reason or another sort of flake out and the ones you didn't expect to step up do in a big way.

I'm sorry you've been having some disappointments; so happy that the choice of groom isn't one of them!

And that piece of writing is beautiful. I love the thought of growing old with someone ordained for me.

Blessing said...

Pele oooo....I'm soooo sorry that you're stressed but by God's grace, everything will be fine...just keep your head up...all the wahala will be worth it!

And those vows are amazing!!!

downtheaisle said...

Oh kemi...I love the blessing of hands...I love the words very profound.

"And lastly, these are the hands that even when wrinkled and aged, will still be reaching for yours, still giving you the same unspoken tenderness with just a touch"

Babe, truly its the people that you least expect to offer help during your planning that would always be there. I remember my days of planning too and how skeptical I was in allowing this people to handle stuffs for me, but you know what they did splendid jobs.
I remember one of my friends picking up a fight over something as petty as asoebi, where she claimed I had distributed asoebi to everyone else before I remembered her.
You know what,just plan as best as you can,and involve your groom as well.

***this is too long...bye!

Yankeenaijababe said...

Take a deep breath sister, when you panic, nothing gets done.

I really hope and believe your day will go well, just do your best and work with those willing to. Avoid ignorant people and hoping you get the invitation card done...

Myne said...

Keep your head down and everything will sort itself out before the day for sure.

The Blessing of the hands, never seen that before but it is beautiful.

MyDressSense said...

no flower girl is certainly beta than no maid of honour, so I'm happy 4 u...my sister tied the knot 2wks ago so I can imagine what stress u r under now, but I know God will give u strength, and wisdom, and grace, for this period...cheers

Anonymous said...

i love your 'zen-ness' about matters like this..
there is only so much shouting and getting mad one can d. seems like a better less stressful outlook.

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