Wednesday, July 1, 2009


Wednesday, July 1, 2009
I miss my babe.

This separation/long distance thing is so tough! My project here is about rounding up though (thank God)and it seems all i can do now is sit and count the days until me and my baby can be reunited again. Everytime I complain to Bolaji he just tells me the story about his mother again. You see, his mom told him this story of once when his dad was posted through his job to Italy for one year. It was a good thing and was seen as some kind of promotion then in his Dad's company. However the whole thing was a bit unexpected and quite sudden, especially for what was a young family still. Bolaji and his siblings were still quite little. His Dad and his Mom talked about it and they both decided that he really didn't have any other option but to go. So they were in essence, physically separated for about a year! Bolaji's Mom tells him that year was the hardest year of her life. She had three young children to take care of and her husband was far away. She had to quickly figure out how to do everything to keep the household running smoothly while still tending and nurturing for the young kids. So because of that story Bolaji tells me, well you know marriage is forever, and there may be times when we have to be separated. So it's better we get a grip now, start learning how to cope so if anything unexpected comes up in the future, it won't be "the most difficult time" of our lives.

I hear all that but I still miss my babe! He's just got a way of making me feel that all is right with the world, and I can do anything, and pretty much just everything good. Whenever I'm strolling in a park and see two love birds I just imagine it's his hands caressing my face or kissing my forehead, or now when I see kids I just picture us as young parents. I feel incomplete when we're not together.


Okay, let me get a grip. In other news...I have to say I can't believe all the extra attention my mom pays me now. Lol. All the things that previously she wouldn't have even bothered herself about she's now so very attentive. This thing makes people behave weird I think! Well, what else has been going on in the engagement front? Ah yes, I'm beginning to get worried that sooner or later all i'll be talking about is wedding this, and wedding that. I can already see it developing. Some of the things I read just scare me, like how in the world is it humanly possible for ONE individual to plan all this stuff??? It's crazy I tell you. If someone has to deal with all this stuff I can't imainge how she'll find time to have a life outside of the big colossal event she's planning.

Something else I also need to ask you guys out there. So after the ring, what happens? My mother is so giddy with excitement and she wants to call Bolaji's parents (they've never met or even talked) but she says she thinks they're supposed to call her first. Everytime I speak to her she keeps reminding me that she can't tell anyone until they call her. Is this really some kind of strict protocol? And also what happens after that? Does anyone have like a rough timeline for traditonal weddings? I'm so clueless.

I was thinking I was going to get a chance to wallow in my clueless oblivion for a while but Bolaji calls me two days ago and says this "I've been thinking, I know we agreed to a long engagement and all but I'd kinda like the traditional to be in December"! ME: (gulp!) December? What makes this even worse is that just the night before my mom was telling me she wants to do traditional in december and I was just fighting her (not really but you know) about it and trying to get her to move it a bit further down and now my gorgeous fiance now says it's a done deal I guess. Isn't December a bit too close? All these people, I want to wallow in my engagement-ness for a bit :-) Actually my main concern is now the time period between traditional engagement and what we had talked about for the white wedding. Trust me, it's over a year! Who would want to come to our white after that? What do you guys think?


yankeenaijababe said...

u make me laugh, I mean just take it one step at a time. So baby has gone back to Naija, you must to really miss him. Definitely you will get more attention especially from your mama,lol More special you know that kinda of feeling. Sha don't go touch another person in the park thinking it's hubby.

There are so many fun websites to read about wedding planning. It should be fun. There are some bloggers getting married this year, I would have to find the link for you.

Enjoy the rest of the week.

Beyond said...

Am so happy things are working out great for you. Long distance are no joke.....sometimes you just want to be the other person....but i guess you will be fine.

I really don't have a clue about planning a trad/wedding but am sure you should be able to find resources online.

QMoney said...

yeah,sounds like a good plan.
For the first introduction,u can have him come to urs with only his parents and a sibling to meet only ur parents and siblings then fix the big engagement parry in december!!
of course u can go ahead to the registry(just the 2 of u), in like january, go ahead to have ur baby or babies as d case may be and do a white party for all and sundry wenever u want.......

doll said...

aw...dec is not too close if hat is what you people want

Sassy Trends said...

well...first time in and liking it anyway..
Point is, a distant relationship is really not the in thing as there might be issues of trust and the likes.. just take things easy and keep hoping for the best dear...

On who shuld call who first, even if coutsey demands that his parens call first, its not a big deal to call and say hello since they know you even if they've not met your mum...

Nice blog though and im following
Wishn you the very best

Lady A said...

Awww, pookie u r such a rookie..mmm that's going to be your nickname from me. U r too sweet. I understand the long distance thing, it makes the heart yearn even more. So enjoy and keep busy. Also, take your time with the wedding. I'm sure someone will guide u along on this wonderful journey. Everything will fall in place, so take it day by day. I'm happy for you Rookie *wink*
I'll get your email add. later so I can send you an invite for the private blog Golden Wives...for the engaged and married only.
Enjoy your weekend dear!

Kemi said...

YNC - lmao @touching random people in the park. Girl, i'm almost to that stage ooo. Good thing I'm heading home very soon. woohoo! please send links to the bloggers, though i've read a few and I think it can all be a bit overwhelming.

Beyond - that's my source (read: obsession) for now, wedding blogs. i'm just saving pictures for now though ;-)

oh QMoney - i think i will be coming to you for lots of advice, being that you just did yours. My family lives abroad and have done so for some 20 odd years now. When I spoke to my Mom, she said she'd just like to go out for dinner with both families. I like that idea so I don't think we're gonna do "intro" as such. We'll see sha.

doll - thanks for stopping by! it's not just that it's close it's that it's so far from the time we want to plan white wedding. i don't know, seems the major player will be the ones having the say in this one, i.e Bolaji and Mama :-)

Sassy - thanks for stopping by!! we're just separated for a short while as I'm on a work project here. However i'll soon be heading home and we'll be together once more, yippee! My future in-laws and I already know each other quite well! Bolaji and I spend Sunday afternoons at their place.

LadyA - i am such a rookie oooo. I just want to be married to my boo, all the rest seems like hard and unnecessary work! Please I'm looking forward to the invite!

bumight said...

long distance, *sigh* as i never seem to like anybody in my zipcode! lol
dont worry, even if all u want to blog about is weddings, we'll still read (there's nothing like living vicariously through other people!)

u could tell ur fiance to have his folks call ur folks?

Anonymous said...

hoohohoho lol engagement date is fixed... kinda..

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