Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Date Nights

Wednesday, May 26, 2010
I love Michelle and Barrack Obama. I really do and I look up to them. I also have quite a few older and not so older married couples that I look up to. Some I know personally, some I don't know. It's just whenever I come across a couple that seems to have it right or have a relationship that I would like myself and Bolaji to have, I just sit and dissect what exactly I like about those relationships and then I try and adopt whichever one I think will work for myself and my boo. I've been doing this for a long time.

Anyway, so one of the things I love about the Obamas is that they go on date nights. The first time I heard about this, I thought, wow, what a great idea. This is both parties taking time out of their very busy schedules to focus on each other and their relationship. So I decided I was going to adopt this for Bo & I and instituted our Date Night Wednesdays. The rules are we don't use the phone, we don't hang out with other people, it's just us, some good wine, and satisfying food. Bo and I have very busy schedules and for Bo especially his work hours can be very erratic. Still, I try to always take a lead on Date Nights and ensure that it is top of our schedules. The times when date nights have been a success, they've been awesome. We end up talking about our hopes and dreams for ourselves, for each other, and also for our baby family. Then we drink like two glasses of wine (we're cheap drunks) and go home and enjoy each other. It's been great!

But my word, it's so challenging! It's really tough for Bo to keep to a consistent schedule because of work. So there've been a few times that I'm so excited about it and look forward to it all day and he just doesn't get home till about 9pm at which point, whatever it is that I've planned is no longer do-able. Yesterday night was one of those days. I've been craving sushi and sake for a while and waking up yesterday was so excited about date night and since we usually eat out on these dates, I'm usually starving by the time we're supposed to go out. Around 7:40 I get a call from my hubby that it's going to be a late one and he's not going to be able to make it. Gosh it's hard to explain how it feels. I got really upset but what can you do? He's my hubby and I love him so of course I gotta slowly put on my forgiving hat. But I'm trying so hard not to be depressed about it. Around 8:30, Bo rolls in and I notice he has a pack with him. I'm still putting on my loving and forgiving wife composure so I smile and hug and kiss him. Then he tells me he's sorry about the time but he's got sushi! Sigh. See, you love a man and he brings you sushi so you won't get mad that he has to make that money for us (he clearly gets paid more than i do! lol) and be late for date nights.

Jesus said to forgive 70 X 70 times, meaning uncountable times lol, therefore my hubby gets a stern look and a thanks for bringing sushi hug! We'll try again next time, or maybe I should move date nights from once a week to once a month? Hmm...


Myne Whitman said...

Aww, he knows how to press the buttons, lol. We do more date nights here cos SO's hours are not so erratic. I will suggest though that instead of Wednesday, you try Friday when most offices are winding down or any other day that works better for both of you. Also throw in some spontaneous days when you're both free, you can take him out for a surprise.

Anonymous said...

yaaaaay :)
twice a month? i really like u guys' story and i pray that God keeps your love going forever and a day

yours TRULY said...

Awww...'date nite' I love...thot about doin that too..
I totally agree with Myne and maybe it would be better if you make it once a month, that was you don't get upset...and u can give your forgiving hat a rest...:D

p.s: God will continue to strengthen u both in JN

Gee said...

awww toooooow sweet!!
first time here and im loving it!
def following u on here--yours truly thanx 4 introducing me!

Anonymous said...

I definitely think you should try Fridays instead of Wednesdays or even Sunday brunch. Or better yet, since his schedule is so erratic, at the beginning of every week, select a day that is lightest for him. Good luck and enjoy your date nights!

Andrea said...

Date nights is very important, either movie, dinner or whatever. I agree with myne can you switch the days if possible. I am proud that you put on the forgiving hat. well done.

yankeenaijababe said...

Why not make it a weekend affair, wednesday is tight schedule, work always tend to get into the way, twice a week or you can even do movie night. What do you think?

Amy said...

So sweet of your guy to bring you sushi! I cosign with the others that think you should try a different day. Sunday brunch is always relaxing and fun!!

doll said...

i second the weekend thing...sunday evening seems perfect

Kemi said...

thanks everyone for comments and wishes and prayers :-) date night this week was fabulous actually. Bolaji remembered it was date night before I did which is a first! I also suggested maybe to change it to once a month and he vetoed that option saying he likes date nights and what it represents so we're still on the weeklies!

@myne I take him out quite frequently actually. Except rules of date nights are just he and I and no body else. Whenever we go out during the week it's usually with someone else.

@anon - thanks sweets. That was nice :-)

@yours truly - my forgiving hat is attached to my shoulders ready to be put on at a moments notice. such is life lol.

@gee thanks for following! welcome to my story.

@anon - thanks. we spend all weekend together anyway and early week is probably worse. maybe thurs or friday. we'll see.

@andrea - thanx!

@YNC - movie night is a great suggestion and our very first date night was a movie night but i end up doing all the set up work! i'm also using date nights as no-cooking nights ;-)

@Amy - sunday brunch? maybe. though we spend weekends together anyway so it doesn't feel...special. lol. i know, i'm demanding!

@doll - sunday evening is our "depressing" time. we both tend to be down in anticipation of the workload of the coming week.

Anonymous said...


i love it when they do that.. you are mad because they haven't done something and then they take they initiative to make it up to you.. *sigh*

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