Thursday, July 16, 2009

Co-Habiting

Thursday, July 16, 2009
Okay since we are all friends now let me share a lirrule secret: Bolaji and I live together. Yes we are Lagosians and yes we live together as in together together. I know waht some of you will be thinking as you read this. What? Never me. I understand that. Since all my adult life that was one rule I had, I will NEVER live with my boyfriend ooo, how would he buy the cow (not that I'm the cow oo but sha just to illustrate) why buy the cow when the milk is free. I totally understand. Even then they say divorce rates for cohabiting couples are high and all that. I truly agree with all those points and if I were to advise anyone I'd say do not live with your boyfriend until a ring is on that finger. However for me life just happened and it is what it is - I couldn't kill myself over it.

See Bolaji and haven't always lived together of course. In our two year relationship I just moved in 6 months ago. I was staying at a family friend's flat while she was away in Maryland. However about 6months ago this girl came to me and said she was getting married and her husband says I can't live there anymore that I had to be out by month's end. See me see trouble ooo. I had just left my job and was in between jobs so there was absolutely no money to start renting a flat. Those of you that live in Lagos can understand that coming up with $10000 to $15000 for two years rent is no joke. I was so distraught and had to even go stay at a cheap hotel for a few days. Bolaji got upset at the situation and my wasting cash at a hotel and said to come stay with him while I figure things out, get a new job, and save cash. So here we are still and the bobo has now proposed to me ooo. I'm still thinking of moving out as we have a long engagement but is it really worth paying out the 2 years rent at this point? Hmm, food for thought abi?

Living together has been interesting. We don't fight at all so that is a great thing but it takes a little getting used to each other at first. Another little nugget of information is that my boo and I are practising celibacy. Now I'm not one of those who would go on about this not understanding that religion and faith is a personal journey filled with trials and challenges but Bolaji and I talked about it and felt that as long as we had each other we would strengthen each other throught this decision we have made. I'll go on about celibacy in another post maybe but as far as us cohabitating it hasn't been that bad sticking to our guns. We are best friends so maybe that's why its not as difficult but who knows.

So there you have it! Another blog post by Blackberry!

2 comments:

Roc said...

I guess end of the day, there will always be someone who breaks a trend.
And I guess you and your man are doing just that..
Just because it didn't work for someone else doesn't mean you guys cant make it work..

Anonymous said...

you guys must be really strong to live together and be celibate.. that's like mega temptation..

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