Thursday, January 6, 2011

Up and Away!

Thursday, January 6, 2011
I find it so so so hard to be away from my husband. I mean incredibly hard. I would have never figured myself out for the type who's extra sappy and clings to her husband every time there's a hint of a small separation, but turns out I am. Bolaji is gone for about a week on a business trip. He's somewhere in Europe. I mentioned that we are both making career changes this year and well, his is going to take him all over the place, a lot of traveling. This is actually the semi-horrible part of the job.

Yes I know the nature of his career but it just doesn't get any easier. I have an over active imagination and every time he tells me he has to travel somewhere my heart sinks. I then start steeling myself and reassuring myself in my faith, God is the only one I can cling to. I actually hate him traveling domestically more than internationally but the fear is still there all the same. Apart from that, I miss my beau so very much. This trip has been weirdly very emotional for me. From yesterday I started the process of steeling myself and then this morning when he actually had to leave for the airport I started getting very misty eyed. Bo was very amorous and kept on telling me he wished I was traveling with him as well. Then he'd give me a kiss and tell me "I love you too much". He did this several times. We also do this thing where I say "I love my husband very much" and he'd respond "well tell my wife she is loved and cherished". So we did that. When the taxi that was taking him to the airport arrived, I asked that he say a prayer like we always do whenever we're about to travel. I was already quite emotional at this point but then in his prayer my beau says,

...And Lord, for my wife that I'm leaving do keep her safe and protect and comfort her. I know what she means to me in my life and I thank you for her love and life...

I don't know why but the tears came and I tried to hold it in but as I opened my eyes after the prayers the tears just fell. I don't know. I felt, little old me. Imperfect old me. And this wonderful, loving human being, sounding so heartfelt and sincere, asking God to please keep his wife. Now this is amazing. I'm going to cry again just remembering how special I felt.

I imagine this is one of the rituals of wifehood. I imagine all happily married women, certainly the newlywed ones, have watched their husband go off on some trip and felt literally like their hearts have been ripped open and packed right along with the luggage. I think there's a time you realize, my gosh, all I have is walking right out that door and into an airplane somewhere and I'm not that easily accessible to him if anything goes wrong. Especially for Nigerian wives, certainly. I mean I even feel that responsibility whenever Bo gets sick. I think to myself, "what would I do? what would I say? who would I go to?" This I think is one of the magic experiences of wifehood. This panic and responsibility for another soul who's so intrinsically linked to yours.

I can't even begin to think about what it'd be like when we have kids...!


Anonymous said...

So sweet!
I don't think every wife, even "newly wed" have this kind of sweet treatment.
You're really blessed. And it is great to see you that you know it...Even if you'll never really realize how much you are.
Im 23 Y.O, not married yet, but longing to...And the love you describe here sounds like fairytale to me (I've read all your blog notes,and even with the ups and down, i still think that your wedding is a fairytale. Love is everywhere between your husband and you. God has the best place too, so for me, what matter the most is included in the package)!

Stay blessed, both you and your husband...And someday, your child(ren)

Sony (from france)

Blessing said...

Awwwwwwwww...You two are sooooooooooooo cute!!!! I pray that he has a safe trip and that the time will go by fast for you *hug*

Happy New Year dear!

Yankeenaijababe said...

I know exactly what you mean, it's love and true love, aww he's be back. Hugs! I always feel the same way with my hubby too and the happiest feeling is having him all around me

H said...

Awww...absolutely adorable.
True love sounds amazing #blush

LucidLilith said...

You guys are just too cute for words. Emm...maybe keep kids at bay for a while to extend your honeymoon as long as possible....*wink*

Kemi said...

@Anon, thanks for your comment. YOU are sweet :-) I know I'm lucky. I feel it every moment of every day. We both know it. We are very grateful for this gift. My relationship is not a fairytale, but it's real. It's challenging but the most rewarding of all things.

@Blessing, Happy New Year to you too! Thanks for the prayers, can't wait till he comes back.

@YNC, if anyone knows what I'm talking about I'm sure you do. I don't know how you do it or did it, you're a strong woman! I remember reading your old blog and saying I want this kind of love, your old blog inspired me to start this one ;-)

@H, you know it's amazing! I pray the same and better for you.

@LucidLilith, Thanks...I so hear ya!

Lily Johnson said...

So so sweet! I believe in true love and what you guys have is just amazing. Happy new year!

gateway360 said...

lovely..just lovely!!!

margaret said...

i paid the required fee and said the required prayers,days later,my man came back home apologising for his wrongs deeds...choice is yours,keep sulking or act..check out

Anonymous said...

*sigh* I might have teared up there... even when my boyfriend goe away or when I am going away and he takes me to the airport.. i tear up.. lol I have loads of tears to look forward to as a wife when it comes to travelling. Good to know i'm not alone.

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